`This week I noticed some things are becoming, dare I say it, routine. I have managed to make my bed daily, the dishes have continued to be caught up, and I have been doing one to two COMPLETE loads of laundry a day. As a matter of fact my husband was home today and he likes to do laundry, couldn't believe that there really wasn't any for him to do. Okay scratch that, he likes to wash and dry then leave clean clothes in a basket for me to figure out if it is clean or dirty, but at least he tries. This week I am going to try and make a list of new habits I would like and add one a week. I wanted to start getting my kids more involved in helping out, but it has been a struggle. My girls turn into vagabonds (love that word) for the summer and my sons number one motivator has not been working. He hasn't been on the computer in weeks, usually that is enough to get him to at least help clean his room, but not anymore.
`AND...... I have another situation that I would like some feedback on. My niece who is 19 lives with my in laws in my home in the in law apartment. Most days of the week I cook for everyone and we all eat together. I have asked my twelve year old and my niece to help out by washing their own dishes after dinner. Both are refusing to do so. It makes dinner time very stressful for me because I view this as a respect issue. It also makes me feel unappreciated. My twelve year old, after some fighting, I am able to get her to comply, but with my niece, if I say anything, my mother in law will do it for her. AND that is not the point. I tried to explain that my in laws help us out a lot and I enjoy being able to provide them with dinner and even clean up afterwards, it is an opportunity for me to give back to them. My niece on the other hand lives with them free of charge, has meals provided for her at the cost of washing a lousy dish and will not do it. Am I being unreasonable?
`On the plus side negative energy is still energy it's amazing how much scrubbing gets done after dinner.
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Good job on your day to days. Sometimes a made bed and a clean counter makes all the difference. I like the idea of adding one task at a time - keeps a person from getting overwhelmed all at once.
ReplyDeleteRegarding your niece - yikes. My MIL complains to me that my niece and nephew aren't a whole bunch different but if asked they will "do" - they just never think to "do" on their own.
Certainly a difficult situation. I would tell you - don't include her at supper (no "pay", no "play") but I have a feeling that wouldn't fly with the MIL (although would it work with the 12 yo?). Honestly - I don't have any good advice - she's 19, maybe sitting her down and asking her why she refuses would make her at least think about it?
Oh dear, teenagers - ack!
hmmmm tanks Shell I might try that I have sat her down and asked her to do the dishes but never asked her why she won't oh the twelve year old knows there are consequences mostly with her I think she forgets about it because it is new she whines about it but does do it when I remind her
ReplyDeleteGreat job on the habits!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Shell that that is a tough situation, and basically with everything she said. Wow. That's a lot for you to deal with.