` I have decided to enlist some help. Mainly I emailed my doctor for medication. Although I feel like a big fat failure for not being able to do it on my own, I am determined not to give up. I can not tell you how much my behavior when it comes to smoking angers me. I wish I had more willpower. I envy those people who just quit and stay quit all on shear willpower.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Here I go again...
`So once again I have FAILED. I am normally not a manipulative person, but when it comes to smoking, it is amazing what I will put myself through and others. My poor husband, I know exactly which buttons to push, and lo and behold he will throw a pack at me. I manipulate myself into believing I can have just one and it won't bother me or make me start all over again. It usually goes something like, "wow I haven't smoked in three day, if I just have one it will settle my nerves and help me not to smoke." CRAZY........ yes I know as a rational adult this is just insane.
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THanks for following my blog. Good luck on the smoking struggles. You are going in the right direction, asking for help when you need it. If there's anything I've learned from my own struggles to get our home under control, it's that things like this are a process. A process that involves failures before we can have success.
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